Last Updated: June 2022 Part of human nature is to be understood, feel wanted and needed. Learning to validate our feelings and those of others builds emotional bridges. Establishing these basic connections lays the foundation for emotional safety. It is this safety that allows us to go out into the world and accomplish our daily […]
Can We Force Someone to Love Us? In my practice as a marriage therapist, I have come to see many common themes present themselves within intimate partner relationships. One of these themes is something I have come to call the ‘Love Gun’ analogy. “Love Gun” Analogy This metaphorical weapon comes into the relationship when, out […]
Tunnel Vision for Behavior or a Substance One of the difficulties in regaining control and reducing compulsive behaviors is the brain becomes fixated on getting the high or pleasure brought on by the behavior or substance. This leaves little to no time for the brain to be aware of emotions, physiological changes, sensations, mental status, […]
As a “Kids’ Movie,” Inside Out is extraordinary. As an educational tool for parents, teachers and behaviorists, it is essential. Sadness, Anger, Disgust, Joy, and Fear are simple, everyday emotions with which we all must learn to cope as our individual personalities develop. Too often, emotions we regard as “unpleasant” or “negative” are pariah feelings. We either suppress […]
Emotions, both pleasant and unpleasant, are part of our humanness. In some cases, we don’t want to feel unpleasant emotions. It’s just too painful. However, there are times when we don’t want to feel pleasant emotions either. Sometimes we don’t think we deserve to feel good. All Emotions have Value For some, their challenge is […]
Presented by Mark Chamberlain, PhD at the “Togetherness Conference” on October 17, 2015. The following content is his PowerPoint presentation. Emotionally Safe Sex “I feel messed up emotionally” “I’m not crazy!” Attachment System: • I still want to be with my husband physically • I want to know he’s near me Avoidance System: • I […]
Presented by Mark Chamberlain, PhD at the “Togetherness Conference” on October 17, 2015. The following content is his PowerPoint presentation. Trauma Response … • Nervous system recognizes danger quickly, safety more slowly. • What you’re doing may be working, just takes longer than expected Physically Calm Your Aroused Nervous System • Breathe – Phone App: […]
Dear Dad, I want to let you know first of all that I love you and forgive you for what this has done in my life. I also wanted to let you know exactly what your porn use has done to my life. You may think that this effects only you, or even your and […]
She tried to call him on his cell phone, but he didn’t answer. It was 4:30 Friday afternoon. She tried again, no answer. An old familiar sick feeling swept over her. Emily pinched her eyes closed, trying to ignore the tidal wave that had just crashed down on top of her. She dialed the number […]
There is a human need to feel connected, bonded and attached to the significant people in our lives. Sometimes we are not sure what we need to feel emotionally safe. Emotional needs are not always easy to identify. If we do know our emotional needs, then sometimes it’s even more difficult to ask our loved […]
