Emotional Safety

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The Love Gun Analogy

by admin

Can We Force Someone to Love Us? In my practice as a marriage therapist, I have come to see many common themes present themselves within intimate partner relationships. One of these themes is something I have come to call the ‘Love Gun’ analogy. This metaphorical weapon comes into the relationship when, out of fear, hurt, […]

Take Notice, Be Observant

Tunnel Vision for Behavior or Substance One of the difficulties in getting out of compulsive behaviors is the brain is so fixated on getting the high or pleasure from engaging in the behavior or substance that there is little if any time for the brain to be aware of emotions, physiological changes, sensations, mental status, […]

We Need All Our Emotions, Even The “Unpleasant” Ones

by Allie Shapiro, MD

As a “Kids’ Movie,” Inside Out is extraordinary. As an educational tool for parents, teachers and behaviorists, it is essential. Sadness, Anger, Disgust, Joy, and Fear are simple, everyday emotions with which we all must learn to cope as our individual personalities develop. Too often, emotions we regard as “unpleasant” or “negative” are pariah feelings. We either suppress […]

Learning to Feel and Accept Emotions

Emotions, both pleasant and unpleasant, are part of our humanness. In some cases, we don’t want to feel unpleasant emotions. It’s just too painful. However, there are times when we don’t want to feel pleasant emotions either. Sometimes we don’t think we deserve to feel good. All Emotions have Value For some, their challenge is […]

Emotionally Safe Sex: Ensuring Sex is About Connection and Healing

by Dr. Mark Chamberlain

Presented by Mark Chamberlain, PhD at the “Togetherness Conference” on October 17, 2015. The following content is his PowerPoint presentation. Emotionally Safe Sex “I feel messed up emotionally” “I’m not crazy!” Attachment System: • I still want to be with my husband physically • I want to know he’s near me Avoidance System: • I […]

The Fear Comes Back Full Force: How to Handle Panic and Trauma Flashbacks

by Dr. Mark Chamberlain

Presented by Mark Chamberlain, PhD at the “Togetherness Conference” on October 17, 2015. The following content is his PowerPoint presentation. Trauma Response … • Nervous system recognizes danger quickly, safety more slowly. • What you’re doing may be working, just takes longer than expected Physically Calm Your Aroused Nervous System • Breathe – Phone App: […]

To My Porn-Watching Dad

by admin

Dear Dad, I want to let you know first of all that I love you and forgive you for what this has done in my life. I also wanted to let you know exactly what your porn use has done to my life. You may think that this effects only you, or even your and […]

I Couldn’t Reach Him and the Fear Came Back

by Dr. Mark Chamberlain

She tried to call him on his cell phone, but he didn’t answer. It was 4:30 Friday afternoon. She tried again, no answer. An old familiar sick feeling swept over her. Emily pinched her eyes closed, trying to ignore the tidal wave that had just crashed down on top of her. She dialed the number […]

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